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Patrick Cruse 18 Aug 2014
Pat Cruse @thakilla
@AmericanAir does it seem reasonable that my wife @AnnieAshworth was on hold for two hours before speaking to someone?
Patrick Cruse 15 Aug 2014
It's been a lifelong goal of mine, but I am finally a published author! I give you......"Chicken Tooth" http://t.co/G5gvm6Qo8J
Patrick Cruse 14 Aug 2014
Until yesterday, I never thought I'd sit on a toilet and encourage another dude to watch my penis while I peed. #HeroPottyTrainingDad
Patrick Cruse 12 Aug 2014
Two players in my game cheers'd their beers together in celebration of the in depth poker strategy talk they were having. #ragingtilt
Patrick Cruse 8 Aug 2014
RT @realhoosierfan: I pulled a @thakilla in the kitchen & finished the corn out of the pot instead of using a container to refrigerate. #Sm…
Basically just renewed my vows to my wife by successfully rapping every word of Too $hort's "Cocktails" to her in the car. #hero
Patrick Cruse 7 Aug 2014
I don't get a 401k or health ins. with my job, but you can't eat raw cookie dough on the couch, while watching golf, on Thursday at noon.
Patrick Cruse 6 Aug 2014
You know you're in a good game when the table captain calls a raise before the flop a "pre-raise". "I should've 'pre-raised' it for more".
How do you know if a fat person went to the gym? They'll tell you. #Zing!
Patrick Cruse 4 Aug 2014
Every time I click a "NSFW" link I think about how sad I'd be if I couldn't have clicked it because I had a job.
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