Tanks a Lot

It’s been a long while since I’ve written an article but I’m looking forward to getting back in the swing of things writing for RankingHero.com. Over my decade in the poker industry I’ve played plenty of hands, met plenty of people, and traveled to plenty of places. Combine these three and I have plenty of stories to tell. Some good, some bad, and some that are well, NSFW.

I figured a good first installment would be to start with the nitty gritty, a poker hand. Sure, we’ve all had someone tell us a hand history, and at some point, they become white noise, but I assure you this hand is quite a doozy.

It takes place during the 2009 WSOP Main Event on Day 2. Blinds were 400/800/100 and I had 40k. UTG limps ten-handed (yes, I know day 2, still ten-handed, sheesh) and I limp behind in utg+1 with 66. A tight kid in utg+2 makes it 4k to go with both of us covered. UTG calls, I decide it’s a good time to set mine and get to stackin’.

The flop comes A96r, check, check, and the initial raiser bets 6800. UTG folds and I start licking my chops. After about 30 seconds I go to call but the very tips of my fingers pick up a second 5k chip and before I realize it, I drop it in the pot forcing a minimum raise to 13600. I said, “ohhh woops” but on the inside I thought, “sweet, not what I planned to do but this definitely works”.

Now it’s the kid’s turn to act and I start thinking that it’s probably a really weird spot for him with a lot of hands. While he’s in the tank with this awkward spot I’m sitting there motionless listening to music. So when your opponent is in the tank, all you really want to do is not give anything away. I don’t know what other people think about while in the tank but my brain starts to wander. Like did I put the laundry in the dryer? What am I going to eat on break? Is there a god? You know, all the normal stuff. Well, 2 minutes into him tanking the song “Nice to Know You” by Incubus pops on. When it reaches its first chorus, “Nice to know you, goodbyeeee” I start thinking, “Man, that would be funny if he had Aces or Nines and I bust out while this song is playing”. Fast forward 3 more minutes of him tanking and another song comes on. I’m stoked since this means he doesn’t have those hands. Yes! I faded the song!

At this point I look at the dealer wondering if I should call the clock, but really it’s the @World Series of Poker Main Event, and it’s a rather unique spot so I’ll give him a few more minutes. The dealer stares at me blankly. Two more minutes go by and the dealer then motions to me and then says that it’s on me. Sayyy what??? I ask how long it’s been on me and he says my opponent went all in 30 seconds after I acted. Whattt?! Wow. I feel terrible. So I swiftly make the call and immediately say “I’m sorry, I have a set of sixes. I didn’t mean to slowroll you, I didn’t know it was on me”. He says, “It’s cool, bro” and flips over Aces. My heart sinks, I’m drawing to one out, which would’ve been the most epic one-outer of all time. Unfortunately, it was not to be and I was quickly and apologetically out the door. I will say it did lessen the blow of busting the #WSOP Main Event because it was such a weird hand and I had already considered it thanks to Incubus.

Just to recap, I accidentally angle shot and slowrolled someone in the same hand and STILL LOST. Yup, it’s really hard to do that.

@Adam Levy 'Roothlus'