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Daniel Stabb 8 Dec 2017
Dan Stabb @DanStabb
It took me 37 years to realize that "Santa Claus Is Coming Town" is the most fear-mongering song of all time.
Fiancée: What do you want for breakfast? 4yo: I want a Paw Patrol set, and... Fiancée: I said breakfast, not Christmas.
When the 4yo almost purchases a microtransaction on #SuperMarioRun... https://t.co/Ag6R8fkaa1
Daniel Stabb 7 Dec 2017
“Now there’s Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and...hey...where the hell did they go?!” https://t.co/5AHd0yN3jB
I guess it’ll be my new annual tradition to post this until he’s impeached... https://t.co/bvj5OBnysp
Conversation with fiancée’s son before bed: Dan: What do you think I would look with footie pajamas? 4yo: You’d look very special.
Daniel Stabb 4 Dec 2017
My tweet should have said "make my savings account even." Thanks, Monday. https://t.co/dCsIwTtbD2
I transferred one dollar from my savings to my checking to make my savings account. The note simply read "OCD."
Daniel Stabb 3 Dec 2017
So I just accidentally called 911 on my Apple Watch. Um...oops?
Question: Where were the Little Drummer Boy's parents?
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